BWAIN Dump

Sonnet 109 – Babying You

2006-03-17T13:22:00.000-08:00

You came home early today.  When I met
you at the front door, it was evident
that you were feeling poorly.  So I let
the cat escape into the yard, hell-bent

as he was on flight.  I took your coat, led
you to the sofa, then made you sit while
I eased shoes from tired feet.  When I said
I’d be your pillow, you let slip a smile

and laid your head upon my lap.  Rubbing
your neck and shoulders, I whispered peace and
rest and love to soothe you.  You were sleeping
deeply within moments.  I can’t pretend

that I’d trade places with any man.  The
cat paws at the pane while you dream of me.

Sonnet 108 – First Shower

2006-03-16T17:34:00.000-08:00

Your hair is washed and clean now, so I fill
my palms with soft soap and rub the liquid
into neck and shoulders and back until
you start to sway and moan.  Feeling wicked,

I wash you with my arms and chest and reach
around to lather your breasts and belly.
Working with purpose – before you can catch
my hands – I trail lips and tongue along the

landscape of you, following the water
which flows along your limbs.  I kneel down and
I turn you to face me as you rest your
thigh on my shoulder.  Writhing hips demand

my attention.  You grip the shower stem
while I kiss and nibble, making you scream.

Sonnet 107 – Unthinkable

2006-03-14T16:53:00.000-08:00

You wanted to make yourself beautiful
for me, though no one else could know what
your desires were.  It was unthinkable
to me that you could shine more brightly, that

you could not see what a wonder you were.
I recall, though, that I dropped my coat when
I first saw you there and I remember
thinking I’d never question you again.

I spent the evening lost in you – I tried
to seem casual even as I fought
the desire to hold you.  I can not hide
my passion for you, though I know I ought

to.  I want to spend a long life in love
with you and I want others to approve.

Sonnet 106 – Wake Me With Kisses

2006-03-14T16:37:00.000-08:00

Wake me with kisses, Love.  The time for rest
has passed and we shouldn’t waste these bright hours
on sleep.  Lean in to me, let one white breast
weigh upon my heart as promised pleasures

stir me.  Let one hand trail along my arm
as you begin to whisper love to me.
Use your lips and tongue to move me, let warm
words rouse me, make me eager and hungry

to please you.  Hold me with your eyes, as well
as with your arms – let me lose myself to
the fire that only I have found there. Tell
me that you want me, that no part of you

is closed to me, that we two should be one.
I never want to wake alone again.

Sonnet 105 – My Dream

2006-03-08T10:20:00.000-08:00

I’m listening to David Sanborn while
he plays “The Dream” and I long to hold you,
to let our noses nuzzle as you smile
just for me.  When first I touched you, I knew

that I would want to spend a long life in
love with you.  I’ve seen us lying in a
hammock while summer breezes slowly spin
the wind chimes hanging on the porch.  No day

could be considered fair that does not end
with you lying by me, your eyes alight
with the joy you find in us.  I would send
you off to dreams dreaming of me.  As night

enfolds you and sleep takes you, I would kiss
you gently, thankful all days end like this.

Sonnet 104 – Baser Spirit

2006-03-08T09:31:00.000-08:00

I can’t afford Chateau Lafitte, though there
was a time I could.  When I was younger,
I drank the finest vintages, whether
it was wise or foolish to surrender

precious hours and dollars so.  Yet the chance
to taste a vine that only wealthy men
could savor, to imagine that romance
as the Rothschilds had known it could begin

to seep into the sap of a man born and
bred much more humbly, gave vicarious
pleasure.  These days, I drink nothing so grand.
And if it’s a baser spirit that moves

me, it’s a spirit that earnestly yearns
to find a beauty that soothes as it burns.

Sonnet 103 – Small Things

2006-03-08T09:06:00.000-08:00

I love to feel how your fingers twine in
my hair while you lean over me and tell
me that we belong.  I cannot begin
to tell you how you move me or how well

you fit every nook of me.  It is
in the small things that our larger truths are
revealed to us.  It’s in the way you kiss
me when no one is looking, as though there

might be someone to disapprove of two
souls so truly met.  It’s in the way we
yearn for each other every hour you
are apart from me.  Angel – promise me

that you’ll see this small man become greater
by your love, that his love brings you pleasure.

Sonnet 102 – I Can Let You Go

2006-02-24T16:50:00.000-08:00

I can let you go now. If you ever
needed me, the need has passed. We are two
creatures who walked for a time together.
Passion needs tending. You’d forgotten who

you were but never lost the habit of
need. I took you unaware. I’m a man
who could move you, could remind you that love
can be more than routine. There is no plan

that guides us to our destiny. It is
chance that shows us a moment and choice that
binds us to another. All our wishes
fall before will, are realized by it.

I wish you to be where you find joy, where
you feel home. I only wish it were here.

Sonnet 101 – Not Malice, But Mischief

2006-02-24T15:01:00.000-08:00

You are maddening and not always in
the best of ways. You have a quick wit and
a wicked streak. Sometimes the impish grin
that comes with your delight will leave a man

left standing less than steady. It’s a bit
disorienting to feel the barb then
see that lovely face, to realize it
is not malice but mischief. Then again,

I’ve come to love that part of you. I’m far
less fleet than you, so my best defense is
to roll with it, to know the heart, the care
for me that lies behind the taunt. One kiss

is all it takes to heal me, Love. So tease
me, then please me with your kinder mercies.

Sonnet 100 – Out of Town

2006-02-24T13:17:00.000-08:00

We’ll be out of town this weekend, away
from home and in-laws and children.  So much
of who we are is bound in them, that we
need to seek ourselves again.  The first touch

will be a revelation, another
finding for two so often lost and found.
Hotel beds are for lovers - the mother
of my children will not lie there.  The sound

I seek would never come from mommy’s voice.
When I look into my lover’s eyes, I
will see you - my one, true love; first choice
for any lifetime.  When, at last, we cry

out for joy, when exhaustion begins to
take its toll, I will hold you, treasure you.

Sonnet 99 – Combrogi

2006-02-24T10:31:00.000-08:00

We were combrogi – companions, brothers,
equals – and we held the light against the
night’s fall.  We didn’t seek battle – others
chose conflict for us and we were simply

there, equipped to lead the cause. So we fought.
We fought for a generation consigned
to fear, to strife, to lack of hope.  We brought
knowledge bought with struggle – our scars remind

us all that no paper pedigree earns
a man respect.  It is the challenge, each
day met with love and dignity, which burns
us, brands us, calls us out and bids us reach

in faith to see the forsaken made more.
We were combrogi – companions endure.

For my brothers and sisters in arms…jwb

Sonnet 98 – I Miss You

2006-02-24T00:06:00.000-08:00

I miss you terribly. Today was a
particularly lonely day. We see
each other so little now that each day
crawls cruelly from sunrise to sleep. The

time we do manage to share is distant –
phone calls and emails are no substitute
for seeing you and holding you. I want
to support you fully and to refute

the notion that this is all about me.
I’ll confess it’s difficult, though. I’m so
much less without you – I’m never truly
happy when we’re apart. I cannot show

this face to others but you should never
doubt you're my best friend, my love, my lover.

Sonnet 97 – Obsession

2006-02-23T23:59:00.000-08:00

I would have thought I would think more of you
with more time on my hands.  That doesn’t seem
to be the case, though.  In fact, I spend no
more time than I did before.  Just one theme

frames my dreams – some would call that obsession,
would think my priorities wrong.  I don’t
agree.  If you consume my attention,
it’s because I choose to let you.  I won’t

feel regret for investing every
possible instant with thoughts of you.  Your
love is precious beyond measure to me.
I will live in a way that makes you sure

I only love you right now...and now…and
now.  I’ll remain yours until all nows end.

Sonnet 96 – Washing Dishes

2006-02-22T10:11:00.000-08:00

I’d storm Hell itself to make you happy.
Any man would – we want to be heroes
for the women that move us. Too many
times we forget to best the daily woes

that make our lovers’ lives less than Heaven.
We forsake the small things. We believe that
they don’t matter, or that they shouldn’t when
there are dragons prowling our landscapes. What

could we do but chase the epic? You
deserve better of the man who needs
you. So I’ll see to smaller things: I’ll do
the mowing while you weed the flower beds.

As we chase each of our dreams and wishes
down, I will stand with you, washing dishes.

Sonnet 95 – I Will Meet You Where You Are

2006-02-21T00:13:00.000-08:00

There are times you have had to stretch to hold
me – it’s just discomfort I feel in your
embrace, not disaffection.  You once told
me that you would gladly tie your future

to mine and you have also felt regret
for the telling.  Your love for me has caused
as much pain as joy – you’d as soon forget
it, dismiss it utterly, see it lost

to memory – but you can’t.  Nor can I.
If we’ve caused each other hurt, it’s not due
to lack of love.  Despite the ache, we try
each day to make love stronger, see it new.

You should know that you need not stretch so far
to hold me - I will meet you where you are.

Sonnet 94 - Communion

2006-02-16T20:52:00.000-08:00

I cannot seem to stop thinking of you.
It’s not the rolling, the writhing, the screams:
for hot monkey love, any wench will do.
Making love with you is the stuff of dreams,

a dance of immense and intimate joy.
It is sacred - the only communion
that any man is likely to truly
understand. This is no simple union

of two bodies. Our spirits reach across
time and miles, each seeking for the other
with fierce urgency and deep tenderness
in the instant we are not together.

I’m a simple man of one mind, of one
thought. Separate us and I am undone.

Sonnet 93 – Banked

2006-02-16T19:40:00.000-08:00

Place your hand upon my chest and feel the
heart that pulsed and prayed for you. Though it beats
now no less strong, it does so more for me,
sustaining passion banked for future needs,

against the coming days of loneliness.
Look into my eyes and you will still find
there my love for you, though it’s burning now
less urgently and grows more cool than kind.

In you I found sweet springtime in the heart
of autumn. Now, with true spring approaching,
I find my leaves have turned. We live apart
and I have grown cold, anticipating

my personal winter. Not even one
day passes when I do not seek the sun.

Sonnet 92 – Mourning Love

2006-02-14T09:30:00.000-08:00

You slide in behind me, breasts to back, then
drape your arm over my side and glide your
hand across my chest, remembering when
there used to be more brown hair than gray here.

Rising on one elbow, you lean down to
buss my temple, trail your lips along my
neck then whisper “Good Morning, Love” while you
roll me to my back and kiss me. Your eye

reflects first sunlight and my first smile and
you begin to move against me. Astride me
now, you seek my worship. You understand
my need for you and my need to be free.

I long to spend my life simply loving
you – touching, trusting, denying mourning.

Sonnet 91 - Shadows

2006-02-14T01:16:00.000-08:00

The same full moon shone for both of us, cast
shadows against the darkness tonight. We
both looked on her and wondered, as clouds passed
across her face, how our lives could possibly

be more cruel and complicated. How could
two souls born for epic find themselves bound
to daily obligations when they should
be free to dance together? When I found

you, I was certain I’d learned the answer
to every sorrow, that I would not feel
loneliness again. How will I ever
find my faith now that wounded hearts will heal?

I know only that I love you, that this
day should have ended with you, with your kiss.

Sonnet 90 – Valentine’s Day

2006-02-14T00:21:00.000-08:00

You deserve roses every day.  There
are times that I forget, though, and days when
no flower would be enough.  You’re a rare
woman, a creature of such uncommon

grace and beauty that there’s no measure
for your worth.  That you would find in me some
small portion of joy gives me pleasure
and fills me with wonder.  I should welcome

any morsel of your affection, yet
I desire all your love and pray you trust
your soul to my care.  My deepest regret
is that I did not find you, love you first.

You deserve roses, but I can only
promise my love and my fidelity.

Sonnet 89 – Here For You

2006-02-09T21:52:00.000-08:00

I long to move you, to fill your sleep with
dreams that make you reach for only me and
to be there when you reach – not for the myth,
but for the man.  When other folks demand

too much of you, sap your strength and leave you
hollow, shaken, tired - let me hold you near,
and restore you to strength.  Let me renew
your faith in friendship:  I will be your ear

when you simply need to speak.  I can learn
to be the husband you hunger for - the
gentle lover who aches to make you burn
before you cry and lie to rest by me.

I’m made more by surrendering to your
needs – it’s lack of loving that makes us poor.

Sonnet 88 – I Am Yours

2006-02-05T22:58:00.000-08:00

I’ve never not loved women; seems to me
they’ve always been marvelous, lovely.  Yet
I’ve never not loved you, if distantly,
and that is harder to explain.  Forget

for a moment that so many say there
is only one true love for each of us,
that the constant heart lacks room to shelter
more.  I would disagree and not because

disagreement agrees with my desire.
My heart has never felt so small.  I’d lose
myself in other’s arms, but I require
more of me because I love you.  I choose

to be your man – as you need me, how you’ll
have me, when you want me.  I am faithful.

Sonnet 87 – Sacred

2006-02-04T11:34:00.000-08:00

It was meant to be a loving tumble -
merely time for us to play. She liked the
hot, rough love, where limbs and blankets jumble,
leaving us tired, gasping. She leapt at me

with no pretense. I wrestled her to our
bed when she thought she’d have the upper hand,
pinned her arms above her head and kissed her.
Wrapping her legs around me, she rolled and

flipped us. Not even stopping to undress,
she danced above me as I moaned beneath.
In that moment she became the Goddess
to me – Gaea, glory and all my faith.

She was primal Beauty, Love and Life.
Then smiling, she kissed me, became my wife.

Sonnet 86 – I Don’t Need You

2006-02-03T06:23:00.000-08:00

I can live without you.  I lived alone once
and I was happy then.  No need to share
my supper and never shushed for silence,
my life was my own and I didn’t care

what others thought of how I lived.  I don’t
need you to fill my arms.  Other lovers
would be happy to hold me, though they won’t
fit like you did.  Even under covers

and in the dark, I would know your perfume
and each of your curves and your hollows.  I
smell you, see your stamp in every room
where we shared joy and laughter.  So I‘ll lie.

I don’t need you.  If I say it often,
I may believe that I’ll find love again.

Sonnet 85 – Surrender

2006-01-31T11:25:00.000-08:00

Surrender yourself to our love once more.
Rest your ankle on my shoulder while I
massage your calf with hands and mouth.  Let your
fear wash through you:  feel it flow far away

as my desire grows, enfolds us both in
our only true home.  Sit in my lap and
let our eyes meet – they’ll hold such sweet passion
suspended between us that no demand

could be denied.  Move with me as you move
me; make me mad to free you.  Hold me, lead
me on to promises that only love
can keep.  Know that I want you, that I need

to please you as no other ever has
or will.  Don’t let us long for “never was”.